蟋蟀
The Cricket
吴冠中
Wu Guangzhong
| 译文摘自张培基《英译中国散文选二》
鬓发斑斑，仍总是忙碌，城中天天忙于无穷事，未有余闲品味童年捉蟋蟀的回忆。然而居室里突然听到了蟋蟀的叫声，我和老伴都感惊喜，高楼里哪来的蟋蟀？那声音似乎发自厨房的一角，我想可能是老伴买蔬菜时夹带回来的。
Grey-templed as I'm, I still always keep myself occupied. Everyday I bustle about town having little time to indulge in pleasant reminiscences of how I used to catch crickets in my childhood. One day, however, my wife and I were pleasantly surprised by the sudden chirping of a cricket in our apartment. How did it get into this tall building? As the sound seemed to come from a corner of our kitchen, I guessed it had probably come with the vegetables my wife bought from the food market.
要点：
1，“鬓发斑斑”=grey- templed =grey – haird;另“忙碌”的新表达keep oneself preoccupied
2,”然而…“译为one day , however…或the other day, however …,one day和the other day是增益成分，起承上启下的作用
3，“高楼里哪来的蟋蟀”即“这声音是如何进到大楼里的？“译为How did it get into this tall building?
4，“那声音似乎发自厨房的一角，我想可能是老伴买蔬菜时夹带回来的。“两句有隐含的因果关系，译为As the sound seemed to come from a corner of our kitchen, I guessed it had probably come with the vegetables my wife bought from the food market.
综述：
本段语言表述上并不难，注意上述几点即可
星期天，小孙女小曲来家，吃晚饭的时候，蟋蟀又高叫起来，一声高于一声，清脆响亮，仿佛是鸣奏。小曲高兴极了，饭也不吃了，要捉蟋蟀。我找来手电，顺着叫声到厨房角落里拨开扫帚、残菜、剩羹、废纸、旧瓶……一直清理到自来水管道周围湿漉漉的水泥地面，果然一只肥大的蟋蟀伏在那里。用手电照准它，它一动也不动，我轻易地将它捉住了。全家欢腾起来，我将蟋蟀放进装颜料用的硬纸匣里，交给小曲。小曲说她要看着蟋蟀叫，她自己找了一个半透明的小塑料瓶，将蟋蟀装入瓶里，观赏这可怜的小俘虏团团转。她奶奶怕蟋蟀窒死，用剪刀将塑料瓶戮了几个透气的小洞。
On Sunday, when our youngest granddaughter Xiao Qu was with us, the cricket started chirping again at supper time with a rising clear and loud sound like in a performance. Xiao Qu was overjoyed and stopped eating as she was eager to catch the insect. Torch in hand, I found my way to a corner of the kitchen by tracing the sound and then cleared away everything in the way, like brooms, discarded outer leaves of vegetables, leftovers, waster paper, used empty bottles, etc. until my eyes fell on a big cricket on the damp cement floor near a water pipe. It stayed still as I lit it up with the torch. So I got it easily. The whole family was wild with joy. I put into an empty colour-tube cardboard box and handed it to my granddaughter. But she said she wanted to have it kept in a transparent container so that she could see it chirp. Then she found a plastic bottle and happily watched the pitiable little captive therein moving about in panic. Her grandma, however, fearing that the cricket might suffocate, punctured a few holes in the plastic bottle with a pair of scissors.
要点：
1，“一声高于一声，清脆响亮，仿佛是鸣奏“其中，译者将”一声高于一声“与”清脆响亮“合译为with a rising clear and loud sound，使得译文也因简洁而显得朴实，贴近原文风格
2，“我找来手电，顺着叫声到厨房角落里拨开扫帚、残菜、剩羹、废纸、旧瓶…”译为Torch in hand, I found my way to a corner of the kitchen by tracing the sound and then cleared away everything in the way, like brooms, discarded outer leaves of vegetables, leftovers, waster paper, used empty bottles, etc.本段为多动词句，译者将“找来手电”译为介词短语，Torch in hand=with a torch in hand,这种用法十分常见，如“（屈原）怀着悲痛的心情，抱了一块石头，投汨罗江自杀了。“译为Overwhelmed with grief and despair,he drown himself in the river,with a large stone in his arms.
3,”… 一直清理到自来水管道周围湿漉漉的水泥地面，果然一只肥大的蟋蟀伏在那里”意即“我看到一只蟋蟀伏在自来水管道周围湿漉漉的水泥地面上“译为until my eyes fell on a big cricket on the damp cement floor near a water pipe.承接上句，继续以“我”作主语，保持主语一致可以使译文更加流畅，避免了转换主语的繁琐，“until”意即”最终“
综述：
2，3两点也可以看作是合译~
小曲将蟋蟀带回去了。
Xiao Qu left for home with the cricket.
夜晚屋里特别寂静，孩子们也都关门睡觉了，我和老伴两人在自己卧室里感到分外孤独。似乎是前所未有的孤独。老伴埋怨我不该捉掉了蟋蟀！
That night a complete silence reigned in our house. Our children had already gone to bed behind the closed door. My wife and I felt unusually lonesome in our bedroom. She blamed it on my having got rid of the cricket.
夜半，蟋蟀又叫起来了，呵，原来不只一只！我和老伴都高兴得不想入睡了。我们不由得回忆起我们当年住在农村老家的日子：古老窗外的星空、萤火虫星星的亮光、夜莺的歌喉，自然总有蟋蟀的伴奏……我们的谈话没完没了：父老、乡亲、谁家和谁家的孩子……这一夜我们似乎远离了北京。愿蟋蟀就在我家定居吧！
Late at night, we heard the chirping of a cricket again. Ah, that must be another one! My wife and I were too excited to sleep. We were lost in memories of our child life in our rural home with the starry sky outside the antique window, the glowing of fireflies, the warbling of nightingales, the ever-present accompaniment of crickets' chirrups... We chatted on and on recalling elders at home, fellow villagers, kids in the neighbourhood, and so on and so forth. All the while, we were transported by nostalgia to our old home remote from Beijing. May the cricket settle down permanently under our roof!
要点:
1,”分外孤独“和“前所未有的孤独”基本上传达了一个意思，即unusually lonesome~
2,” 老伴埋怨我不该捉掉了蟋蟀”译为She blamed it on my having got rid of the cricket.“埋怨某人做某事”=blame sb on sth 可以学起来了
3，“原来不只一只”采取反话正说，译为that must be another one!
4，“回忆起”=be lost in memory ;”没完没了“=on and on
5，“谁家和谁家的孩子“不宜直译，意译为kids in the neighbourhood
6，“这一夜我们似乎远离了北京“意为”夜中思乡之情似乎把我们带到远离北京的故乡去了“，可以直译为Throughout the night, we felt as if we were in a place far away from Beijing.然而译者为我们呈现了另一种译法we were transported by nostalgia to our old home remote from Beijing,其中be transported into意为“在想象中被带入”，而nostalgic是文中的增益成分
综述：
本文主要内容作者日常生活和感触，语言平实简单，无复杂句式，因此在翻译时最好也不要太“文绉绉”了~译文中出现的一些新表达值得大家积累~
声明:本双语文章的中文评析系沪江英语原创内容,转载请注明出处。中文评析仅代表作者个人观点，如有不妥之处，欢迎指正。
